Comments on: He Doesn’t Want A Girlfriend, But He Acts Like Your Boyfriend

By: Rita

Rita — Thu, 10 Feb 2022 10:18:34 +0000

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By: The1AndOnlyDC

The1AndOnlyDC — Tue, 15 Jun 2021 12:57:25 +0000

Ok I can say after reading all this as a guy I can relate. But I’m one of the guys that’s not interested in playing games. My last relationship from day one of course I tried bagging it the first night. But when I was asked I flat out said I’m not interested in a relationship at the time but I am interested and n being friends. Well weeks months down the road again the question was brought up an again I was asked are we a couple. I responded with well hell I guess if you want to place a label on it because we’re with each other everyday. Well ten years down the road an now separated with a 7 year old daughter. I’m more so looking back at it as at the time I was afraid of commitment. Hell I still am. But now as a father that still tries to be as much part of my daughters life as her mother will physically tolerate. It’s not what it was seeing her every morning prior before walking out the door for work kissing her on the forehead an tucking her back in bed. But again I believe when kids get involved it’s much more difficult. An I believe there’s a lot of valid points brought up on either side of the argument. I’m just simply gunna say it takes two. If you mention it prior or not. Yes a lot of guys are just dogs an trying to tag another one, but for any lady or woman here reading this that says she hasn’t look at a man like a piece of meat in her life one time or another isn’t being honest with her self let alone everyone else here. Because woman can sometime be just as ruthless as men when approaching a mate there instead or intrigued with. An I believe sometimes things need to be rediscussed every once in awhile. Because things do in fact change over time an so do people’s dreams an intentions. But I think it’s at that precise time an moment it’s the persons responsibility to notify the other person or party involved in the relationship. Of course being raised with both parents in the picture it’s difficult trying to Co-parents as it’s called these days because my Ex has moved on an has introduced a new guy In the picture around my daughter. Now as a alpha male first response to this “caveman style” is go do a bunch of crap out of “caveman anger” that’s not really good for anyone imagine or there for lack of great impression being instilled in my daughters memory….so moving forward with all past an current harbored feelings of affection or so for lack of feeling. Handing the situation heartlessly with just the best intentions for our daughter is the way I proceed to handle things. Again like it’s a robot with the greater good of humanity in my thoughts only. Hahah. Great topic to discuss amongst the genders to see who wants to start placing blame on who first but again I’ll say it. “IT TAKES TWO”. Sometime three if your into that Kinda stuff but you catch the drift.

By: Ann-Marie

Ann-Marie — Sun, 20 Dec 2020 15:36:27 +0000

Great article. I have been dating a guy (long distance he lives in Germany and I am in the UK) for 2 years like this, but it was totally fine as i dont want a commitment. Recently (sept) I moved countries and now live only a 15min bike ride away from him. Honestly I expected this all ti end by week 1 after I arrived as the bilubble of long distance has burst, but it didnt. I really like this guy but struggle with the whole having a relationship side, hes the same but when we are together it’s like we are a couple. We’ve been away together, stay at each others places, cook together, on the anniversary of his dads death he called me and I was round to keep him company we go shopping (I mean he even pays for my groceries now and then), hes bought me shoes (he even bought me a cheese fondue which he says is for us).
I agree with the article but sometimes I do wonder with my own relationship exactly what we are doing (hes 45 divorced no kids and I’m 40 never been married and no kids).

By: luwam

luwam — Sat, 27 Jan 2018 00:43:00 +0000

Omgg!! This is so perfect. I honestly have had enough of this particular guy that goes to my college. First of all, let me begin by saying this ‘guy’ that I’m going to be talking about is such a narcissist; he LOVES himself & i mean , really LOVES himself lol all does is talk about how big his muscles are getting due to his gym workouts & how many girls he can get (BS) & to make matters worse he has to be the one of the most paranoid, angry , rude individual i have come across in a long time!! So,, to get to my point, there’s this girl who also goes to the college and speaks the same language as him & I’m not blind so I see them both talking and acting like they’re in a relationship but when I confronted her to see if they were , she said they weren’t & were just friends but I doubt that’s true or they just hiding how they’re feeling BUT as an outsider , I wouldn’t enter a relationship with him at ALL because of his personality; he is literally rude to EVERYONE ughh!! (I feel like he might have a personality disorder & the girl is too blind by his “love” to see that ??

By: Steven

Steven — Tue, 23 Jan 2018 19:10:00 +0000

If guys like this piss people off, maybe don’t be dumb and just refuse to be put in this situation. It’s not the car salesman’s fault if you get a lemon, its yours because you have to put a little effort in and see what you are going to get. If he says right from the start he’s not going to want a relationship, then tell him to piss off. If you stay with the man after he says all this, that just makes you a needy moron. Stop blaming the guys, and start by not being dumb. There’s a start! If you put more thought into buying yourself a new microwave before you decide to buy, then maybe put the same effort into determining if the relationship you are getting into is a good one. It’s blaming the brick wall when you willingly drive into it. Stop pointing fingers, do the positive and “Take the plank out of your own eye before you take the sliver out of your brother’s” Like when a guy says that a woman ‘seduced’ him. Yep, the seductress hogtied you and threw you into bed? It’s funny how many 200lb pound guys get seduced by women who are 120lbs soaking wet. Let’s all accept that you sometimes pick shitty men, you can only blame yourself and try to do better. Let’s not be weak-minded.

By: Done with MB

Done with MB — Mon, 22 Jan 2018 16:57:00 +0000

Bye bye baby!!

By: Anonymous JD

Anonymous JD — Fri, 19 Jan 2018 15:52:00 +0000

This is a really well written article and it has really helped me put things into perspective. So thank you for that.
I’ve been in this limbo situation with this guy for 4 years now. Not the entire 4 years were like this. The first two years we were dating on an off. There were a lot of red flags that I saw right from the start and I had a lot of trust issues with him because of which I would get really upset and try to take a step back from this relationship. I heard from people that he tried to flirt with girls when I wasn’t there. He would also never talk about the future and when he did it would be really vague and it didn’t seem like it definitely included me in it. So that would be at the back of my mind too. But every time I pulled away or when we were on a break, he would make the extra effort. He would call all the time, he would get upset if I was talking to other guys, he would constantly try to make plans. And it made me hopeful again and would go back to him. And then it just became a cycle. I think I let this cycle go on because I have had a hard time finding people that I can connect with. Physically and emotionally. And with him, maybe it was just comfortable, but we did connect. And so I guess I always took the easy way out and thought that maybe things would be different this time around.
The last two years have been emotionally draining. The last time we “broke up”, I told him that I wasn’t comfortable being in a committed relationship with him. I was getting older and hadn’t dated too many people and I wanted to do that. But obviously my feelings for him didn’t go away. And he was more than happy to not be committed, but wouldn’t let go of me completely. And I let him hang on to me, because things weren’t really working out elsewhere. And that might also be because I never gave it my 100% to try to find someone else. So that resulted in us being in this limbo state, which we still are in, where we aren’t in a committed relationship but behave like we are in one when we are together. Which is all the time.
And time goes by real fast. Without realizing its been 2 years. And I feel trapped. I don’t know how to get out of this. I’m so emotionally attached but at the same time so frustrated. Being in a relationship with him makes me scared because I know what that can mean long term. But then I don’t know why I’m so afraid to just let him go completely or why the thought of removing him from my life is so unsettling. I don’t want to be with him but how am I ever going to be with someone else if this continues.
Also the thought of him talking to other girls makes me upset. And this is the biggest issue that I’m currently battling. Although the whole point of not getting back together with him, even though he’s brought it up multiple times, was that I could talk to other people. But the thought of this resulting in him having another girlfriend makes me sick to my stomach. How do I get over the deep feeling of rejection caused by him pursuing other women? It would be great if you wonderful people could give me some advice on that.