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12 Ways To Turn Him On Without Touching Him


Want to learn how to turn him on? Yeah I know, just get naked, but not this time. We previously discussed the 12 Ways To Turn Her On Without Touching Her, and now we must do the same for the men. I will let you know now that I intentionally left off things like appearance because most of you already understand that men are very visual. I wanted to point out the qualities of more substance that may come as a surprise to some women. Make sure you read it all, and truly process what’s being said. I made sure to ask around, and do a quick survey on my facebook page. So sit back and learn some of the qualities that can turn a man on.

1. Transparency

When a woman can be honest, clear, and consistent, that can be very sexy. When a man feels he has to constantly play the guessing game with a woman, that isn’t appealing, it’s just confusing and frustrating. This doesn’t mean a woman has to tell all her business to a man she barely knows. It just means that you don’t play games, you say what you mean, and you mean what you say.

2. Confidence

A confident woman knows who she is and embraces her self-worth. It is refreshing to see and it definitely draws the attention of most (if not all) men. It can easily raise a man’s desire for that woman, and only enhances her beauty. Confidence is sexy point blank period, but like it was mentioned on the men’s list, don’t confuse it with arrogance and being stank! Yeah I said stank, and that will only get you so far.

3. Sense of Humor

A woman doesn’t have to have jokes ready to toss out every time she talks to a man. But the ability to smile, laugh, and just lighten up can go a long way. Some women are just too serious, and don’t really know how to have a good time. When a woman can learn to let go, throw some humor in from time to time, and enjoy life, that makes her very appealing. If she can make him laugh too, big bonus, but just being able to laugh with him will have a positive impact.

4. Poise

A woman that knows how to carry herself is a huge turn on for a lot of men. She knows how to be a lady in the streets, and we’ll leave the freak part alone for today. Being very secure with herself and knowing how to be classy when needed is very much respected. When a woman seems to be all over the place, or emotionally unstable, that will make most men eliminate that women from any potential of a serious relationship and will flat out turn a lot of men off.

5. Knowing How To Cook

“The way to a man’s heart is through his stomach”. I don’t completely agree with this quote, but I do know that when a man finds a woman who can cook, a lot of them get very excited. Literally they will report back to their friends, “man this girl is fine, has a good job, super cool, AND SHE CAN COOK!”. They may break out in celebration right there, because she obviously is now a keeper. Or course this isn’t a turn on for all men, but it surely has never been a turn off. Cooking skills are almost always a plus.

6. Loyal

A lot of men don’t trust women. They may have been burned in the past or seen a lot of betrayal in other situations. So when that man comes across a woman that he views as loyal, it can have a very strong impact on him. Loyalty is an attribute men place a lot of value in. It doesn’t matter if it’s family, friends, or sports, they want it and are drawn to it. This is one attribute that it will take longer to assess, but once it’s acknowledged, it can speak volumes.

7. Passion/Desire

If a woman comes off as boring and lacking any passion in her life, that can actually make her less attractive in the eyes of some men. Yet when a woman is comfortable and confident enough to show desire and passion, that can be a huge turn on. This doesn’t mean a woman should throw herself at a man (that’s where poise comes in). It just means having that energy that can be very contagious and contribute to sparks flying.

8. Intelligence

Contrary to what some women may believe, a lot of men love smart women. They don’t like the women who thinks that her high level of intelligence gives her a right to be condescending, rude, or disrespectful. Yet plenty of men appreciate and are intrigued by a sharp woman who can also have a good conversation on a variety of topics. A smart woman adds value to the relationship, and a lot of men are very turned on by that.

9. Unselfish

Selfish is never sexy. A woman having a me, me , me attitude can quickly push a man away and cause him to lose his desire for her. When a woman has a caring, giving, and nurturing spirit, that is exactly what most men are very happy to see in that woman. Men crave that, and are just drawn to that type of energy. It’s a very good look on a woman, and a man is likely to take notice of it.

10. Genuine

Just be yourself. It’s that plain and simple. People are drawn to those that are genuine, and men are no different. A woman who keeps it real, and embraces who she is, is very sexy. It will exude that confidence I spoke about earlier in this article. Some women go out of their way to try to be and look like someone they’re not. You might pull off sexy for a day, but being genuine can make you sexy for life.

11. Independent

Yes, a lot of men are turned on by an independent woman. The fact that she can be self sufficient, and doesn’t need a man to survive definitely works in her favor. This woman adds value to a man’s life, as long as she doesn’t devalue the need to embrace the love he wants to give her. It isn’t her ability to be independent that most men dislike, it is the unwillingness to bring down walls and understand that interdependence is needed and desired for a very happy and fulfilling relationship.

12. Embraces Respect

First that means having self respect. A woman with standards and demands respect, not in a overly aggressive or abrasive way, but does so while still embracing her feminine energy is greatly admired. When she also knows how to treat others in a respectful and positive manner this just makes her that much more beautiful. She isn’t a pushover by any means, because that isn’t a turn on at all. She just knows she deserves to be treated with respect, and she knows how to speak to a man in a way that makes him want her, not hate her.

I know some women will read this and say they have seen plenty of women get men despite lacking many of these qualities. The choices that some men make don’t tell the whole story, and it doesn’t change the fact that a lot of men do genuinely desire these qualities when they are entertaining the possibility of more than just a sexual relationship. So these qualities should be embraced and can bring very positive results.

If you desire an amazing and fulfilling relationship, then get your copy of the bestselling book God Where Is My Boaz ON SALE NOW here on  Kindle, Paperback, or Audio Book format. You can also get the PDF version HERE

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46 thoughts on “12 Ways To Turn Him On Without Touching Him”

  1. Trudie Burns

    I've been told many times, the physical is what attracts, no matter how nice the girl is, if she isn't in an accepting weight range, guys will pass her over for someone who is.. So I will have to say, though it would be nice to agree that this is accurate, I will have to say it does not happen, not in this day in age, maybe 20 years ago, but more and more are becoming superficial and shallow..

  2. The physical will always be a factor Trudie, but that alone will never be enough. So these other traits are important, and they are desired. However I do acknowledge that appearance plays a big role for a lot of men, and women as well.

  3. Magali Lacanau

    I agree Trudie, I've been on some dating web sites and its your picture most men look at, regardless that they are looking for the qualities listed here by Stephan. Whether you are on genuine dating sites or not. The less genuine one are where the guys do find you appealing but are only after sex, these are the ones that have no self-respect and look for women with no self-respect, no self-worth and looking for a quick roll in the hay.

  4. La'Shanda Bradley Dorsey

    Thanks for these 12 points of advice. I have about 8 of the 12. I can see now where I can improve and I am ok with that.

  5. Lloyda Alicia

    Funny but I think this list is exactly what would turn me on if I found them in a man give or take a few adjectives.

  6. Angel Voice

    The list is on point. The unwillingness to be bring down walls is one that challenges me. But of course that would be because I have not met a man worth taking that risk. I am very guarded and I have to be because I my mini me to guide and protect along with our heavenly Father.

  7. Highlyfavored Foggie

    I so agree with every one of the statements.

  8. James E. Jr McGollie

    I think it mixed one important thing… comfort level. I can't find someone appealing if I'm not comfortable to be myself around them.

  9. Tosha Perry

    Thats the same as trust

  10. James E. Jr McGollie

    Trust is a broader way of looking at it. I can trust you without being comfortable.

  11. Deborah Seals

    Dating over 60 & finding a date ?

  12. Ayanna Asante

    Okay I got this list down pack but there is always room for improvement. Somethings on this list is what turns me on about a man

  13. Ayanna Asante

    I am the same way as a woman if I can't get comfortable around a man I'm turned off.

  14. Chantell Supermom Lundall

    I agree with the list.However most men still go for the women who don't possess half of what's on the list.its like it's too much work for them.

  15. Keisha

    I actually agree with every statement. However having all of these qualities as a woman doesn’t make it easier for Men of color to accept these traits.

  16. Courtney McGill

    I disagree. High-quality men will be attracted to high-quality women possessing these traits. Low-quality men will be attracted to low-quality women. You attract what you are.

  17. I have to agree. It's hard to be yourself if you don't feel comfortable around a person. If a woman has that level of comfort with a man, then the confidence, poise, intelligence, respect and all the other points on this list will just fall into place.

  18. Sharonda Holt

    Maybe, however, your missing an important piece of the puzzle. Just as Stephen disclosed this list has more volume for the man seeking an relationship. Vs. Only sex. So if you see a man involved with a woman absent of those attributes. Know that his focus is more on sex than an long term committed relationship.

  19. Chantell Supermom Lundall

    That's ur opinion Courtney so do u have a High-qaulity man?

  20. Sharonda Holt

    If you have the right man and your the right woman for him he will satisfy you if you let him. Nothing works if your not on the same page. Dont have casual sex with a man. If your looking for a long term relationship.

  21. Sharonda Holt

    Thank you Supermom. Yeah I was a bit confused by Courtneys response. She disagreed??? What was it to disagree with with that type of response. That is an reality. We do attract. Not so much what we are but what were willing to tolerate. Whats a high – low quality person? People are attracted to what your willing to give them or what they may desire at the moment.

  22. Chantell Supermom Lundall

    U so right Sharonda I have been tolerating far less than I'm worth.i am however in the healing dating is off the cards for a while until I feel ready

  23. I agree, Usually a man without these same characteristics use these assets against us. I have set my standards a lot higher because I know I have these characteristics and I am worth more than I have received in life.

  24. Valerie Thomas

    Great article and very on point. Keep on sharing ..

  25. You can be all this and more but if a man is not ready or physical attractive to the women it won't work.

  26. The list says what a man wants and that's a real woman who have most if not all of these qualities. A boy will settle for almost anyone.

  27. Insightful article on 12 ways to turn in out without touching him.. Thanks

  28. RD

    I totally agree. I would add on to number 8 talking about intelligence. There are many guys out there that come across as a “know it all.” They tend to overlook facts and rant based on mere opinion. The ability to say “I don`t know too much on that topic” is better than demanding to be right. This goes for women as well 🙂

  29. RD

    Not to sound “money hungry,” but being well off financially shows a woman that you are dependable and reliable. Woman want to feel secure and having ‘dough’ can aid toward a better feeling of security. Once again this can also go for woman as well 🙂

  30. Deanne Robinson

    very good article! I would like to read an article written with the woman in mind. I know I am attreacked to an man more mentally that I am phyisically at times. i like to read about what a man needs to do to turn us girls on. Because I think there is still a perception that we woman are only attracted to a man with muscles and no brain and visia versa. and we dont know how to act with either. I like to know what men know about how to really attract and maintain the mind body and spirit of a woman he says hes attracted to… Even though I agree that there are women who may still havent gone the message about how to attract a man without dressing or acting what I percieve to be wild. And, yes,I find that what some women call confidence these days make me want to throw up!

    Myself, I never had to drop my standands to be in the company of a man. Its been my experience thats is more about my abilities and my respect for myself ,and men in general. and less about my sexuality and the low cut top or ultra tight dress I wear. I find that men are more attracted to the intellect, the attitude and values of a woman more than I think some women give them credit for!I just think its out of touch if they are men and women still thinking and behaving that a woman has to show nearly all of herself to attract keep a woman. I think men can do alot to change that perception as well as women.

  31. I would love to learn more about how to speak to a man that causes him to want her and not hate her.

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