One of the biggest complaints I hear from men is how women always go for bad boys a.k.a a**holes. They have been led to believe that good guys finish last, and that being nice is a bad thing. A lot of men are frustrated by the fact that women claim they want a good guy, but when that man presents himself he is shot down or simply overlooked. The good guys have watched the bad boys get all the benefits while their kindness is viewed as weakness and taken advantage off. Some men have grown tired of this and have embraced the belief that “the worse you treat her the more you will get from her”. So there is an epidemic of bad boy a.k.a a**hole behavior by men partly due to the fact that they believe this is the most effective way to get what they want. Is this really the case? Is being a so-called bad boy the most effective way to get a woman?
In my opinion it’s not that women really like some of the a**hole behavior that comes with a bad boy, but there are certain traits in those guys that they do admire. Confidence, being assertive, and being unpredictable is what is really drawing a woman to those bad boys. Even though for some of these men the confidence is a mirage, they have an “I don’t give a damn” attitude that allows them to show enough confidence to catch a woman’s attention. The good guys aren’t always as sure of themselves, especially when dealing with a woman they really like. When a man lacks some confidence then it becomes easier for a woman to intimidate him and she can easily pick up on that. Bad boys also know how to put their foot down. They aren’t going to let anybody just run all over them and they have no issue being assertive and standing their ground. A lot of good guys on the other hand tend to be too passive. They are so busy trying to please the woman, and possibly please others, that they let people get away with too much. That causes them to be viewed as punks or as soft men who can’t handle their own. No woman truly wants a punk but many will quickly take advantage of one if the opportunity presents itself. As for being unpredictable, because bad boys are more self-absorbed and they don’t really care, it’s hard to call his next move. Bad boys keep that woman guessing, and that challenge has some women hypnotized. She may not truly be into him, but seeing if she can tame him and get the majority of his attention becomes an unhealthy competition that she is focused on. With good guys she can typically call their very next move. That guy is so busy chasing her so no real challenge exists. It’s too easy, and sometimes human nature is to become complacent or uninterested when something is just too easy.
Women are so drawn to those traits that they accept all the other crap that comes along with it. They sit there hoping they can change some of the bad boys behavior while keeping those core traits intact. So should good guys just all become a**holes? NO! The solution is for good guys to take on the admired attributes of the a**hole and strike a better balance. Continue to be a man who can cherish a woman and treat her like a queen but put your foot down in a heartbeat if she even thinks about disrespecting you. You have to embrace your value as a good man and let that turn into genuine confidence which will catch the attention of many women. Be a source of love, joy, excitement, and all those good things but you don’t need to force it upon her. Meaning you can be that great guy but if she does not want it or can’t appreciate it then let her ass walk! I know it can be tough when you really want her or are truly into her but I repeat LET HER ASS WALK! It’s not about treating a woman like crap like some a**holes do but you have to know how to stand your ground and not be her puppet. Ultimately you have to become the man you were called to be if you expect to be the man she will want to always be with. So don’t worry about how the a**hole ended up with that beautiful woman. He will pay a price for his behavior but you have much more to gain from staying true to yourself and making the necessary improvements.
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