happy couple maintaining successful relationship

4 Keys To Starting And Maintaining A Successful Relationship

We can give people plenty of tips and tricks on how to attract the opposite sex. Many are always looking for great ways to pull it off but in that process they  overlook some very important things. Most truly desire a successful relationship but a good foundation has to be in place in order for that to happen. I’m not talking success as in just staying together because plenty of people remain in unhealthy and toxic relationships. I’m talking the success that creates a loving, positive, and fulfilling relationship in the way that all can appreciate. There are plenty of factors but here are four I feel are good to start with. Read my book, How to Get a Man to Cherish You, for more help.

Know Yourself

Far too many times we try to run away from being single, and find someone to be with before we truly know and embrace who we are. Some feel you have to date or be in multiple relationships to figure that out. I disagree, I believe you can achieve this in many other ways that don’t involve constantly getting into relationships that will likely cause more damage because you aren’t truly ready for one. If you don’t know and love yourself first then how can you expect someone else to truly know and properly love you as well.

Be Honest

If you start a relationship on lies then there is a very good chance it will eventually come crashing down due to more lies. Lies eventually catch up to us and in the process create an environment of doubt and mistrust that will only spread more negativity in all aspects of that relationship. I know none of us are perfect and chances are that all of us haven’t been 100% honest. We still should do better and embrace a more honest approach. Not just with that person but with ourselves as well. Ignoring the truths you feel inside is typically a  setup for living a lie you know isn’t best.


Honesty is great but if you aren’t talking then you don’t have a chance to implement it and see how good it can be. We always hear communication is key and this is simply the truth. A relationship lacking in communication is one that is less likely to be successful. We can’t get to know each other or begin to have a greater understanding if we don’t take the time talk. Both sides should feel like they can open up and express themselves. This minimizes the chances of issues lingering  and not being properly addressed. At the end of the day if we can’t talk to each other than should we really entertain trying to be together?

Develop a Friendship

When we are friends the other three on this list become a lot easier to accomplish. Many times dating is just an audition and the only people who go to auditions are performers. If we want to build something genuine with this person then we shouldn’t overlook the importance of being friends with that person. When a genuine friendship is in place you are able to enjoy that person for who they are and not necessarily what they can give you. It creates a great foundation for a fun, happy, and loving relationship. If they aren’t the type of person you would really be good friends with then why bother trying to be their lover?

I believe that is a pretty strong four to focus on. Personally I am a man of GOD but I like to write my articles in a way that people of any belief can appreciate and gain something from. So if I added one more to the list it would be about faith and spirituality but I’ll just address that in another article. Ultimately I feel we should focus less on getting a relationship and more on setting up the best relationship for us. One that can be fruitful and positive. It may take some time but it will all be worth it in the end.

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  • Courtney Lebedzinski
    Posted at 16:43h, 28 January Reply

    I think you hit the nail on the head with this one!  There are endless articles written about attracting the opposite sex.  Most of these how-to guides aren’t helpful because following them step-by-step leads to contrived conversation and fake relationships. 

    Stephan, I love how this article focuses on honesty.  You have to be authentically you – to know and love yourself first.  That will make you irresistible to anyone.  Great advice!

  • Theincrediblemsg
    Posted at 23:16h, 23 February Reply

    The nuts and bolts!!! Self Inventory is a priority……Love this!

  • Victoria Louise Thomas
    Posted at 01:41h, 25 September Reply

    Your articles are like my favorite beverage — cool, sweet and always make me feel empowered!! 🙂

  • Mandy Hansen
    Posted at 04:11h, 24 December Reply

    Communication is tough but loving myself is the hardest one for me. Which brings me always to more trust and better communication. Being alone during the Holidays is okay this year for me. I am loving your articles. Merry Christmas.

  • Leonard Emmanuel Nsingwini
    Posted at 17:30h, 01 February Reply

    You truly are Heavenly sent my dear Sir…

  • ron
    Posted at 14:25h, 01 February Reply

    These thing that have been said is so true. Some times we do think before we act. We have to know our mate and partner wish I would have read this three weeks ago

    • roro
      Posted at 06:22h, 04 April Reply

      Me too!

  • Alexandra Pizarro
    Posted at 03:14h, 13 March Reply


  • Jacques Gray
    Posted at 03:16h, 13 March Reply

    Thank you so much God bless..

  • Valerie Williams
    Posted at 09:33h, 13 March Reply

    I love it…thank u for the time u take to write us all..food for the mind …all them r very important to me what u name…friend ship is important

  • Angel Marie Mercado
    Posted at 15:52h, 13 March Reply

    I love forward to reading your articles daily … thank you and thank God for blessing us with your touching truthful words

  • Gloria Williams
    Posted at 23:55h, 13 March Reply

    Very good article – I am just starting to date again after a bad marriage. I did not want to get hurt again so I lived in fear of the what if's. I giving dating another try put going very slow.

  • Ashley ExtremlyBlessd Gipson
    Posted at 03:05h, 03 April Reply

    #So true

  • Celeste Lawson
    Posted at 03:23h, 03 April Reply

    After listening to your audio book, I hear your voice when I read your posts. Kind of cool. 🙂 It's amazing how technology and social media can make you feel connected to people you've never met.

  • Chris Thompson
    Posted at 07:38h, 03 April Reply

    Thank you….on point! On point!

  • Natasha Namwinga
    Posted at 10:31h, 03 April Reply

    Thanx for the tip.

  • Nicki Hensley
    Posted at 12:42h, 03 April Reply

    So very true! I have made some of these mistakes, but I have come to realize that I have to love myself before anyone can love the real me and I have become comfortable with being single instead of being in a relationship just to say I am. I show the real me and although most people can't handle the honesty, that is what they get! But I'm good with it!! Thank you for taking the time to pass on your great advice and tips!! 🙂

  • Sandra Blessedbeyondbelief Butler
    Posted at 02:35h, 12 September Reply

    Agree with you.

  • Lorinda Rin Reddie
    Posted at 22:21h, 11 October Reply

    I love how you stress "genuine friendship". Too many folks think they are friends but are clearly in the acquaintance stage. Folks need to know and understand what it truly means to be a "FREIND" and as you said the rest will follow. 🙂 GREAT ARTICLE

  • Sugey Reyes
    Posted at 22:50h, 11 October Reply

    Thank you. You hit the most important layers needed to ultimately create a fulfilling relationship.

  • Vee Ro-Zay Rose Clarke
    Posted at 08:55h, 13 November Reply

    Bravo!!! Thank You for this AWESOME article. Plenty of great tips, for a HEALTHY relationship. #WordsOfWisdom

  • Andreate Lala
    Posted at 01:18h, 20 November Reply

    Agreed!!! Pretty simple, yet many seem not to be able to follow through

  • Lerato Lolo Matona
    Posted at 04:50h, 20 November Reply

    wow a good eye opener indeed, sometimes we overlook this tips, to me they are the foundation of any relationship, thank you so much.

  • Mary Charles
    Posted at 11:42h, 07 January Reply

    Thank you well put togethet

  • Mary Charles
    Posted at 11:47h, 07 January Reply

    Thank You the article well Put together very informative.

  • Kimbereley Lorraine Edwards-Fitts
    Posted at 13:55h, 07 January Reply

    Agree with the four.love for what you see and not what you want it to be. I life coach also….beautiful

  • Tray
    Posted at 11:05h, 07 January Reply

    I agree. You are truly an inspiration. I thank you so much for your willingness to see others happy. Your the best

  • Angie Marie Cervantes
    Posted at 22:37h, 09 January Reply

    I thank God for you Stephan! You are a huuuuuge blessing!

  • Sherri Bannister
    Posted at 16:31h, 27 January Reply

    Great article….

  • Tammy Dyer
    Posted at 14:58h, 27 January Reply

    I very much agree with your article you definitely have to know your self before you can know what you want in life and a relationship and you should always learn to be friends first and the rest will all fall into place. Believe me I have two teenage girls and me and their father are giving this relationship a second go now that were older and wiser we started this on the right page this time and I couldn’t be happier I am truly in love with this man and we are truly best friends. GOD BLESSED me and him GOD BLESS ALL GOOD LUCK

  • Author Stacey Crutcher
    Posted at 05:15h, 28 January Reply

    I think when one actually begin to apply these four keys within their daily life builds a solid foundation for starting and maintaining an healthy relationship with someone in the near future.

  • Sharrone Rowland
    Posted at 14:36h, 28 January Reply


  • Grace Miss-Mellow Thalifi
    Posted at 08:50h, 03 July Reply

    Thank you man of God we need more people like you in this world

  • Patience Kufa
    Posted at 07:24h, 23 July Reply

    Timing not a coincidence for me! Thank you

  • Simone Lovesbeingagrandma Callahan
    Posted at 01:40h, 15 August Reply

    WOW THANKS for giving me information on how to keep a RELATIONSHIP HAPPY AND HEALTHY

  • Lenora Wilson
    Posted at 14:55h, 30 August Reply

    I truly love your motivation for relationships thank you for all your knowledge

  • Francisco Ramirez III
    Posted at 15:57h, 30 August Reply

    thank you Sir.
    God Bless!

  • Jewel C. Knowles
    Posted at 16:18h, 30 August Reply

    Thank you Bro Stephen

  • Iwina Washington
    Posted at 14:18h, 19 October Reply

    These articals are a good read for good peolpe trying to understand relationships

  • Sherry Moore
    Posted at 18:46h, 07 April Reply

    I agree, that if you don't find it in yourself to open and express yourself it will not work and I had this happen when my husband has an affair and now the affair has ended we have have learned to open up and share. We have been working on being honest and it so happen that has help and the women is out of our life. We will be married 21 years and we love each more than ever before. Fiding myself was worth it.

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