Confused Woman - Derrick Jaxn

8 Things a Woman Should NEVER Get Confused

Alicia Keys said it best, “A real man knows a real woman when he seeees her.” But what she didn’t know is that a real man was going to go write a book and tell these young girls to think like a man, causing them to get confused and make twerking videos on Youtube.

Basically, we got it all mixed up. We can’t continue going on rants about how lost our young ladies are without showing them the way. So I took it upon myself to compile a small list of the preponderance(you like that word huh?) that has our young ladies baffled. No, I’m not excusing men, but Rome wasn’t built-in a day, so work with me. For young girls who don’t know and for grown women who want to help out those following in their footsteps, these are the things you should NEVER get confused.

1. Sex for Love: He drinks a Red Bull, stretches, and even keeps his Timbs on; then acts like everything but a gentleman in the bedroom ’til your toes catch a cramp. But make no mistake, his heart is in his chest, not his underwear.

2. Attention for Loyalty: “But he’s coming home to me every night”=the cry of a woman who forgot her worth a long time ago. A man will have sex with your sister, drive home with the gas money you gave him, and say “Baby I had a long day, I just wanna cuddle” when you try to give him goodnight sex. You think that attention he’s giving you means you’re not sharing it with someone else? Yeah..ok.

3. Good looks for Beauty: You may go through life gracing every mirror you walk past, but if you treat everyone like they’re beneath you, your family will be the only ones at your funeral. The ones who do show up.

4. Real N**ga for a Real Man: Some girls want a guy to “put them in their place” like a parent does a child. A real man wants a woman who knows her place is by his side.

5. Compliments for Respect: He went and ‘liked’ all your bathroom sink mirror pics and recited a couple Drake lines so you think it’s real huh? The more you blush, the more he’s going to tutor his homeboys on how to get you to have sex after he tells you he’s “just not ready for a relationship”.

6. Nice personality for Good character: He can make you laugh. Check. He’s smooth with words. Check. He’s witty and can hold an intelligent conversation? Check. But on that weekend you’re on your period, will he turn down that one thirsty chick he used to have sex with that never learned to let go?

7. Lust for Chemistry: You know that tingly feeling you get when you first see him. Everything just seems right about his smile, his walk, and the way he looks at you? It’s called hormones, not love at first sight.

8. Cockiness for High Self Esteem: A bad b**ch has nothing on a woman who knows she’s a queen. Period.

So here comes that hug your Mom would give you after she gave you a whooping and told you you’d thank her for it later. Ladies, stop getting things mixed up. No, it’s not your fault you have to decode anything, but it’s better to know now than to be left feeling lonely years later running into the arms of some man who just isn’t for you. Knowing the game keeps you from having to play it, and if you don’t play it, you’ll never lose.

If you desire an amazing and fulfilling relationship, then get your copy of my bestselling book God Where Is My Boaz ON SALE NOW here on  Kindle, Paperback, or Audio Book format. You can also get the PDF version HERE

  • ETM
    Posted at 19:34h, 12 July Reply

    Although it may hurt some, honesty never fails! Great advice and words of wisdom!

  • Alexia Madison
    Posted at 21:37h, 12 July Reply

    Some of that was hard to swallow, but it’s good to know. Lol.

  • EJB
    Posted at 23:39h, 12 July Reply

    The first two points is a little to vague for me. But I appreciate everything else

    • JAXN Tweets™
      Posted at 09:06h, 13 July Reply

      1. Great sex doesn’t mean he’s in love. Can’t take everything a man says to heart when he’s in the moment.
      2.Just because he “comes home every night” doesn’t mean he’s being faithful.

      • aaliyah
        Posted at 17:22h, 12 February Reply

        In a relationship right now with a married man and I know his wife be saying he comes home at night what about the nights he dont come home?

        • Barb
          Posted at 19:11h, 12 February Reply

          WHY would you choose to be in a relationship with a married man? Please run as far away as possible. He will not be loyal to you if he is cheating with you.

        • Angel
          Posted at 18:27h, 25 April Reply

          Aalyah if hes married why and how can you call it a relationship????

  • Pierre
    Posted at 20:39h, 13 July Reply

    I haven’t made these mistake yet but I’m glad I read this

  • tiffanydenise
    Posted at 15:59h, 07 August Reply


  • Ebony Huffman
    Posted at 14:49h, 26 August Reply

    Yaaaaaaassssssss!!!!!! My God!

  • Demecos JustMeco Chambers
    Posted at 14:44h, 11 September Reply

    Great sermon sir

  • Kimmy
    Posted at 00:56h, 13 September Reply

    Thank you. Great advice and key eye openers!

  • Laneatrice Long
    Posted at 00:37h, 17 September Reply

    this is so true

  • Rebecca Mrtzs
    Posted at 19:31h, 27 September Reply

    So true

  • Mary Nikki Jones
    Posted at 00:30h, 30 September Reply

    Very well put!

  • Pam Carter Harris
    Posted at 17:24h, 05 October Reply

    Yes I agree so true….

  • Dalma Antoine Brown
    Posted at 01:32h, 13 October Reply

    He is so right.

  • Dalma
    Posted at 21:36h, 12 October Reply

    I totally agree with this post.

  • Sue Nassie
    Posted at 05:04h, 14 October Reply


  • Angel McKenzie
    Posted at 13:10h, 27 October Reply

    I agree

  • Star
    Posted at 19:23h, 29 October Reply

    That last sentence…Amen

  • Paige Jackson
    Posted at 22:52h, 31 October Reply

    So true. Had to learn the hard way.

  • Shavon Williams
    Posted at 00:22h, 10 November Reply

    Love it! Love it! God bless you exceedingly and more abundantly above all you ask or imagine of Him. Amen:)

  • Joelle
    Posted at 12:11h, 17 November Reply

    Nice post. I need to share this

  • vanessa dennis
    Posted at 22:30h, 01 December Reply

    The part where he said just not ready for a relationship hmm I could relate to that …

  • Olivia Christchild Narcisse
    Posted at 10:12h, 02 December Reply

    very accurate

  • Cathy Cagle
    Posted at 22:19h, 19 December Reply

    Wow I love it!

  • TruthIs TruthIs
    Posted at 19:58h, 09 January Reply


  • Shaya Barnes
    Posted at 14:25h, 22 January Reply

    MMmhmmm this will me screen shoot and sent to a few of my girls! Reality is not always wrapped with a bow!

  • Kathy MacKay
    Posted at 23:39h, 12 February Reply

    I'm old so can someone tell me what a boas is?

  • Rose DeVere
    Posted at 23:55h, 12 February Reply

    Read the Bible…The Book of Ruth

  • Kim Kemistry Bethel
    Posted at 16:15h, 18 February Reply

    Tell it like it is…..thanks.

  • Chikita Humbly Blessed Jefferson
    Posted at 22:31h, 12 March Reply

    Great article!

  • Tc Mngenela
    Posted at 08:49h, 14 March Reply

    Its not a TREND Kathy it's in the bible….read the book of Ruth.

  • Ashley Horsley
    Posted at 22:11h, 25 April Reply


  • Sprinkles McFeverish
    Posted at 22:36h, 25 April Reply

    yes great article Derrik.. but no need to look so angry in the pic

  • Verdell Marsh-Dawson
    Posted at 02:30h, 26 April Reply

    You said that!!! Nothing but the truth!!

  • McJenn Soderquist
    Posted at 05:04h, 26 April Reply

    Yup, the son of a senior played me like a game, he got what he wanted after a few months. Please. Just cause he goes to church most of his life, doesn't always me he is a good man, I was confused, angry and everything, I have facts on him that I could always show our friends, but waiting for the moment and I don't know if they will kick him out after hurting me, paying me as his sick game.

  • McJenn Soderquist
    Posted at 05:04h, 26 April Reply

    Son of a senior paster**

  • Lisa Deez
    Posted at 04:30h, 27 April Reply

    Wow Tc, Kathy simply asked a question. It appears Rose already answered her. A month before you. Kathy also never mentioned a TREND Tc. 🙂

  • Derrick Jaxn
    Posted at 07:01h, 29 April Reply

    It was the lighting. lol Thanks for reading

  • Derrick Jaxn
    Posted at 07:02h, 29 April Reply

    Glad you enjoyed it Verdell. Please continue to support myself and Stephan Speaks. God bless.

  • Verdell Marsh-Dawson
    Posted at 07:11h, 29 April Reply

    I will Derrick Jaxn. Bless you also. Keep it coming.

  • divasdestiny
    Posted at 18:36h, 19 May Reply


  • Arlene Prioleau
    Posted at 20:49h, 26 May Reply

    Way a man will tell they love u an when you don’t give them what they want he start calling name everything but the child of god in the being everything is OK but as time go no than the real them come out I pray ask god to send the right one there are not out I have seen him yet but it OK I just want to no where they at

  • Saundra Monique
    Posted at 03:30h, 10 June Reply

    Definitely the truth it took me some time to learn all of this and now I'm glad I did.

  • Caroline Jackson
    Posted at 13:59h, 12 June Reply

    Love it my summer is going to be a great time to Learn why I enjoy being single at 40

  • Sylvia
    Posted at 18:49h, 26 August Reply

    Thank you once again for your brilliance my dear Derrick Jaxn. Agree with most but not all, however, I adore your brain and how it works. Keep sharing. You are appreciated.

  • K EsStaire
    Posted at 09:11h, 01 November Reply


  • Jonnette M Doran
    Posted at 14:34h, 01 November Reply

    Good advice

  • jdzs32
    Posted at 10:36h, 01 November Reply

    I feel like I wear a sign on my back that says attracted to mamma boys I’m trying to get my relationship worked out now with my boyfriend and dealing with this

  • Qiana Browder
    Posted at 17:29h, 15 December Reply

    U r awsome

  • Annet Khainza
    Posted at 00:18h, 27 December Reply

    very insightful

  • Angel Voice
    Posted at 11:45h, 08 January Reply

    Every woman must read this then just sit quietly and meditate.

  • Gail Hawkins
    Posted at 00:21h, 09 January Reply

    Great Information

  • Tanisha Brown
    Posted at 07:24h, 09 January Reply

    Wish I had this years ago

  • Gina Hepburn
    Posted at 00:01h, 19 December Reply

    Sooo true and needs to be heard. .
    Thank you

  • Ralda Singleton
    Posted at 01:02h, 21 December Reply

    You are the best thanks

  • Elizabeth Emmanuel
    Posted at 21:55h, 14 February Reply

    Good advice

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