5 Reasons Why You May Need To Be Single



single-opportunity-relationship-quotes-stephan-labossiereThere is nothing wrong with being single! Too many people have made being single the equivalent to having a disease that needs to be cured right away. People will immediately assume something must be wrong with you and to be honest there likely is something that needs to be addressed within you. Not because you’re single but because you are a human being and we all have issues. Some will overlook these issues and jump into a relationship anyway. Only to have it all bite them in the ass later on and create more issues. The reality is that there are a lot of people who need to be single right now and here are 5 reasons this may be true for you.

You Don’t Truly Know Yourself. – How can you really know what’s best for you if you have yet to figure yourself out. How can you expect another person to embrace who you truly are when you are more concerned with showing them who you think they want. Bottom line is you can’t and you shouldn’t. As individuals we need to be more patient when it comes to trying to be in a relationship.  Being so obsessed with getting somebody can cause many to lose themselves and not take the time to get to know themselves. Maximize your time being single by learning how to love and embrace who you are.

You Don’t Know How To Take Care Of Yourself. – Most people want to find someone who compliments their life. They don’t want someone who will drain them but can’t uplift them. Almost everybody likes to have someone who is “capable” of taking care of them in the way that they need. Unfortunately some of you can’t even take care of yourself so you damn sure can’t take care of someone else. Strive to be an individual that can be dependable and knows how to handle your business. Grow to be a persons partner and not a grown child that they have to constantly take care of.

You Still Want To Live The Single Life. – Some people want to look like they’re single, talk like they’re single, and behave like they’re single. Yet still want to be in a relationship and not be “single”. You can’t have it both ways and you should take some time to get your “single desires” out of your system. Entertaining relationships when you still want to have your “fun” isn’t fair to that person and you are just setting yourself up for failure. Until you are truly ready for something serious…just stay single.

You Are Still “In Love” With Your Ex. – Running into the arms of another to get past an ex is not something I would ever recommend. Many times all you are doing is distracting yourself but the issue has not gone away. Whatever happened in that past relationship needs to be worked through within yourself. Being with another person isn’t usually the best way to achieve that despite what some may think. It isn’t fair to put the new person (rebound) in this position because before you know it this issue will surface and the drama will begin.

You Have Deeper Issues You Need To Address. – Like I said earlier we all have some issues. Some of us have deeper issues than others and have never truly addressed them. Whether it be sexual abuse, severe heartbreak, absence of our fathers or mothers, and others. These issues are best addressed before you go looking to get into a relationship. Whether you realize it or not these things will likely have a negative impact on your life and your relationships if you try to ignore them. Get the help you need and put yourself in a much better position to receive the great things you deserve.

It’s not that it is impossible to work these things out while in a relationship. It just makes it a lot harder and increases the chances of more damage being done along the way. Being single should be an opportunity to grow and prepare your life for what the future has for you. Some may find fulfillment in remaining single and some may find their fulfillment in getting married one day. Whichever will apply to you will be best achieved when you stop treating being single as a pitfall and start treating it as an opportunity. 

Certified Relationship Expert & Life Coach. Author of the book “How To Get A Married Woman To Have Sex With You…If You’re Her Husband”

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  • http://twitter.com/factsonman Facts On Men

    Ultimately I think that anyone who goes into a relationship has to know what they want. You make some really valid points in this post.
    Just to add to it I would also say that if you are dealing with any of what Stephan says above you will have to deal with some consequences unless you have a very supportive partner.

  • Realbridge1

    The best part of being Single is that you don’t have to account for your whereabouts you are absolutely Free to do you…Come and Go as you so please I Love it.

    • Joelle Paule

      that is the best part I think lol I love it too

  • Cturner1224

    WoW! Enlightening!

  • Joelle Paule

    Stephan said it all, when you are single and you are not ashamed of accepting your relationship status because you are working you a better you, people try to downgrade you as if you are the problem! or as if you are not worthy of being in a relationship… LOL makes me laugh because those same people are the ones in relationships but try to holler at the single women/men. I love this post, im learning a lot about myself since I started to embrace my status and I cannot be proud of myself for the improvement and the things I find out while on the journey. ENLIGHTENING 

  • Bubblez 506

    Makes everything so clear

  • Efecats

    I am still single by choice. It seems that every man I meet wants a bootie call or expects me to sleep  with them on the first or even second date. That is not me !!! It seems all the men I meet never want to get to know the real me and never get a second date.

  • Geo2mefox

    i’m single. tried the married life twice. have 2 beautiful adult children from that. it’s so funny, people do say they have someone to fix-me-up-with, all the time. i say no, i;m good but i can tell they dont believe me…until we get to know one another and i find-out that they are envious of my single lifestyle (simplicity with a dash of mad fun), and most usually very unhappy in their marriages ( I do not and will never sleep  with a ‘taken’ man.). i laugh and ask them why then did they want to fix me up?  They usually dont have a good answer at that point. I think it’s an animal instinct to want to pair people-up.  well, i’ve evolved and my evolution involves really preferring to remain single!!

  • http://twitter.com/xllx_wyld_xllx Kristen

    I’m single because most of the guys around here are abusive, jobless, drunks that cheat on their gf’s and smell like armpit. I refuse to settle for another POS out of loneliness.

  • AngelicDove30

    I am glad that you mentioned this. I am 23 and I remember when I turned a guy down because I did not want to talk to him. He automatically thought I had a problem. I laughed. I do not mind being single, but some of the things you have mentioned are the reason why I am.

  • waithes

    I love that I’m single at this point in life after graduating college. Yes I can work on myself and I’m open to meeting someone to share my life with at the right time. It can be hard when most of your friends are in a relationship or married but I try my best to get involved in fun activities and make new friends and maybe meet someone in the process.