Pages Menu
TwitterFacebookexpert stephan labossiere googleplus life coach stephan speaks instagram college speaker stephan speaks youtube
Categories Menu

Posted by on Sep 29, 2013 in Advice for Men, Advice for Women | 15 comments Tags: , ,

Friends: 3 Ways To Know If Your Friends Are Real or Fake

Group of real friends and fake friends

In a world filled with internet gangsters, reality TV, manufactured food, and hair weave. It has become really hard to know what’s real and what’s fake. This principle holds true when trying to determine real friends vs. fake friends. People will smile in your face all day long, but then turn around and betray you with ease. Thankfully not everyone is like that, but how can you tell? Well here are 3 ways to help you determine if your friends are real or fake.

1. Are They Givers or Do They Only Take

Some of your friends will call you in a heartbeat when they need something. They know you are always willing to help, and that makes life a lot easier for them. Days, weeks, and in some cases even months can pass without hearing from them. Yet, if they need help, you better believe it’s you they’re calling. When the day comes that you finally ask them for something, every excuse in the book is given as to why they can’t do it. They never offer you assistance, and bottom line they probably won’t. This is one clear sign you are dealing with fake friends. Real friends look out for each other, while fake friends just look out for themselves.

2. Are They Willing To Say It To Your Face

It’s not always easy to tell a friend how you really feel. It should be done, but sometimes you may vent to others about the issue. I’m sure some of you thinking that if they talk behind your back, then that is enough to label them as fake friends. I understand that position but don’t completely agree, because even real friends have moments of weakness. If they are constantly doing it, and making a blatant effort to speak negatively of you, then yeah there is a problem.  The true test in my opinion is if you call them out on it, and they not only deny it, but go right back to talking trash about you. At that point there is almost no way around them falling under the fake friends category. Real friends should at least be willing to own up to it, or stop the behavior that is causing an issue. They hopefully would have already said it to your face, and hopefully as their friend, you would be willing to listen.

3. Are Your Friends Able To Be Happy For You

We are all human, and sometimes friends may get a little jealous of your accomplishments. I honestly think that is normal and doesn’t immediately mean you have fake friends. The issue is when they are never happy for you and allow that jealously to get completely out of control. They always have something negative to say or dismiss what is important to you. Real friends take some joy out of seeing you do better, fake friends get mad because you are doing better than them. A real friend should try to find a way to address the jealousy issue, but fake friends don’t see an issue at all. Just be mindful that being honest about bad decisions you may be making isn’t the same as not being able to be happy for you. A real friend will struggle with seeing you in a situation that you may not truly belong in, and you shouldn’t just dismiss them as being fake to defend your actions.

At the end of the day, take a look around and be mindful of who you are surrounding yourself with. Are they real friends who may struggle every now and then with some issues, or are they fake friends who always seem to create issues. You don’t need negative people in your life who will just hold you back from making progress. If a friend does one of the above things mentioned, talk to them honestly about it. How they handle it will make it much easier for you to see if they are just here for their own benefit, or if they can be counted as one of your real friends.

**For updates, giveaways, special offers, and more; be sure to sign up and join my mailing list here. **

 

Stephan Labossiere – has written 107 posts on this site.
is a Certified Life & Relationship Coach, Speaker, and Author of the #1 Best Seller "God Where Is My Boaz" as well as the Award Winning book "How To Get A Woman To Have Sex With You...If You're Her Husband". Stephan is on a mission to help men and women experience happier, healthier, and more fulfilling relationships. He is a highly sought after coach and speaker who has been seen, heard and chronicled in various national and international media outlets. soulmate

  • http://rumpunchdrunk.blogspot.com/ Rum Punch Drunk

    That’s why it’s important to take the time to get to know the people you call friends. Nobody wants to find out who their real friends are when they are right in the middle of a difficult situation but on the flip side, that’s also a good time, right.

    I certainly don’t have many friends, but the ones I have, I can rely on them 100% to be honest, reliable, to give sound unbiased advice and many more things. Even if they speak negatively to me about myself, I know that they are not doing it in malice. You’ve given some good pointers in this post. Thanks.

    • Thatchic

      That is true because my so called best buddy befriended my husband.. An she jst completely starting calling an texting him with her probs.. An now she does nt talk with me at all jst my husband an his family.

  • Reed

    I tell my friends like it is, period. What I say behind your back I’ve already said to your face. I should never be called two face because I believe if you talk about others TO me then you talk to others ABOUT me. I will give a stranger a shirt off my back & never ask for anything in return. Part of my problem as a friend is I am always here for them, even when I’m struggling on my own, but I never ask for help. I wish I could, I just cannot.